Old Lady

Oh, September 30^th, how I love thee…let me count the ways:  1) My lesbian-bag-not-a-purse arrived yesterday. It is quite cool and makes me look thinner. Do not doubt the truth of that last part. See, I don’t have to carry my wallet and Blackberry in my back pockets anymore so I look like I’ve lost 10 pounds in my ass.

2) I had cake for breakfast and will be having cake right before bed.

3) I get to take Zeca to tumbling class and listen to the teacher speak of herself in the third person.

4) The maintenance guy is cleaning the carpet right by my cube so I get to listen to a really loud vacuum and smell weird chemicals!

5) I have money in my pocket to buy books and music (*Note to self: you have a bag now – put your money in there).

6) Nobody seems to notice that I am not doing any work at all.

7) There are cards (and a present) waiting for me at home. 

Such a day calls for haiku action! 

I am forty one I think I just broke my hip While drinking coffee

and

I am getting old There are things I can’t do now Like work my iPod

Excuse me while I go comb my lovely gray locks (wish that was hyperbole) and take my Geritol.